What people say to DJs

May 09 2016

"I've been a full time DJ for around 14 years with some degree of success, travelling the world, competing in the world final of Red Bull Thre3style, and playing alongside many of my heroes. However, the bread and butter for someone at my level tends to be more prosaic bar and club work, with the kind of requests that make for excellent tweets. Here are some highlights from over the years.

* Have you got something for someone who's with someone but wants to fuck someone else?
* Have you got that song? Its by a blonde lady?
* Play some Avicii, Avicii is hip hop. [At a hip hop night, this girl stuck around for around 20 minutes arguing her case]
* Play something a bank manager would like, you know, like 50 Cent or Lil Wayne or something
* Do you do requests? "well, that depends on the request really" OK - so what's a good song?
* Can you turn this one off, I don't know it [was during Fleetwood Mac - Everywhere]
* Have you got the one by the black guy? You know... wotsisname
* For the next song can you play one a bit like this one?
* I've been here an hour, I have to say I really don't like what you are playing
* Can you play something I know? "what do you know" Everything. But not this.
* When are you gonna play my request? "It's on now, you cheered when it came on"
* Have you got that song with the beat?
* Have you got Britney? "No" What about Take That? "No, sorry." Well, you must have JLS?!
* Can you play something we can dance to? [while Chic - I Want Your Love was on, although that has been said to me hundreds of times in total, almost always when something absolutely classic is on]
* Have you got anything good? [get this one at least once a week, generally reply with "sorry, no - orders of the management, only allowed to play terrible music"]

And of course that time the girl who'd been moaning all night without ever actually making a request handed me a napkin which had "You are a terrible DJ" written on it!

As well as music my other great passion is food and eating out around London - I have a blog called Beats & Burgers if you want to check that out, and I'm pretty much always on Twitter, find me there at @djsantero

Book recommendations -
Dan Gardner - Risk; The Science and Politics of Fear
Nick Cohen - What's Left?
David Byrne - How Music Works
Carlos Ruiz Zafon - The Shadow of the Wind.
Sam Harris & Maajid Nawaz - Islam and The Future of Tolerance


Be lucky! "

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