I'm late for a very important date

July 19 2015

Hello! I hope you are all having a great day! This email will just be some of my thoughts, as I love to know whats going on in others minds.

1) I am a 21-year-old student studying engineering. I move every four months because of my co-op stream, which makes life pass by extraordinarily quickly. Imagine just as you're getting used to a place, having to leave it. For someone that is more introverted, I find this very hard. Especially when it comes to making friends.

2) I suck at responding to people. I'm the person that gets back to you a week later. I don't know how to stop it as I think I would have closer friends if I kept up with them more when we're away from each other. I leave sticky notes and random text messages to myself to try and remind myself to get back to people, but I just don't. Maybe it's because I'm not always sure what to say back or maybe I'm selfish and content with the information I have and feel no need to share further. I hope it's not the second. Sometimes I think thats it's all the platforms that are "required". Maybe if I picked one it would be easier. But I love having the opportunity to catch glimpses into other peoples lives (that facebook etc provides) too much to delete it.

3) I struggle with working hard at school. I don't necessarily feel like I have a goal right now that I'm striving towards. Grad school? A job? What kind of job? I like everything I've done on co-op so it doesn't make it much easier.

4) When I'm in a good mood my self-esteem can be quite high. I feel like the cards that were dealt to me in life were pretty fantastic as I'm capable of a lot of different things, often conflicting with stereotypes and assumptions that people have about me (aka I'd consider myself a girly girl, but I'm in engineering which is typically considered a more male career path). I actually really like this about myself and I like to think that it it helps me to withhold judgement from other people until I know them better.

5) This being about to do a lot of things is also the bane of my existence as it adds to my indecisiveness, which is already quite high. I have done so many different things in terms of sports or other activities and I wouldn't say I am great at any of them, but capable in all. Jack of all trades types of things. Thats exactly what my degree is too as I pretty much sample all of the engineering disciplines plus get some really cool electives.

6) I'm moving to San Francisco (bay area) soon! If anyone is in that area would you mind messaging me with things you think I should really do while I'm down there? Alcatraz and the Golden Gate Bridge are like my two things right now other than just wandering around SF.

7) I'm terrified of waking up one day and not having made enough memories. I try to keep a journal, but haven't been able to do so consistently since grade 3, when it was all trivial stuff and silly crushes on boys. I also try to say yes when people ask me to do things (only when it's safe and I'm moderately comfortable! No surprise tattoos) to allow for events to happen that would cultivate those memories. I have a few good ones.

That's all! :)
- Aryn

Aryn Maxwell
[email protected]
Waterloo, ON

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