The Joys of Blasphemy

January 01 2013

"DISOBEY, v.t. To celebrate with an appropriate ceremony the maturity of a command." ~ Ambrose Bierce

Today, be a blasphemer. Hug a heretic. After you read this, go slay some sacred cows. But, get this right, you're not to pick the easy ones - not the fat, bow-legged, short-sighted cows, the thick fillets-on-four-legs already cosying up to the butcher. The ones you want to hunt down will be trim, lively, prize-specimen sacred cows. Hell, slaughter a farm of them. Skin them, roast them over a low fire and let them cook through. Turn out a line of leather jackets.

You have much choice. Religions are of course bountiful hunting grounds, but today you'll want to pursue the more unsuspecting of cherished beliefs. Plumb the depths of your community's moral presumptions, find a principle too valuable to question and turn it on its head, renounce it, cut it up. Be analytical or be brash, subtle or vulgar.

Will this make you feel happy or inspired? Unlikely. Will it give your life new meaning or help you find yourself? Hopefully not. But it will certainly make 2013 begin on an interesting note.

Tariq Desai
Cape Town, South Africa

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